Clinical psychologist Heather Irvine-Rundle agrees with Martin: It doesnt take into account relationships that are safe and trusting. Kiss Your Kids On The Lips? Dr. Charlotte Reznick, a psychologist at the University of California UCLA said a 'peck' on the lips from parents can cause confusion. This opened up the debate: Is kissing your kids ok? She recommends asking yourself: is it age-appropriate, and do they want to be kissed? Practices such askissing achild onthe lips, along with other invasive behaviors like tightly swaddling, force-feeding, oroverly aggressive tickling, can convey the message that their personal space isopen tointrusion. Here are some things to keep in mind when it comes to kissing your child. Is It Bad To Kiss Your Kids On The Lips? - Awareness Act There has recently been an uproar about Victoria Beckham kissing her daughter on the lips. Read More, A Psychologist Explains Why We Should Stop Kissing Children on the Lips. It gets very confusing. [2]. "They see their father and mother kissing on the mouth, and then Mum and Dad come and do the same with them," the Family Share story said. Clinical psychologist, author, founder of DrPsychMom.com. A lot of research has proved that if you have poor hygiene and you kiss your children on the lips you are transmitting bacteria to them . A Psychologist Explains Why It Inevitably Harms the Child. It Is Fine To Kiss Your Kids On The Lips, Obviously Your California Privacy Rights/Privacy Policy. The truth is, there is a controversy and the polarized sides are miles aparteven the experts disagree on this topic. I think hugging is very important and a kiss on the check is ok. No, parents should not kiss their kids on their lips. Its normal and healthy to be affectionate to your children. Dr. Charlotte Reznick, a psychologist at the University of California UCLA, says parents kissing their children, such as a peck on the lips, may cause confusion. Several others commented as well, saying that kids and parents shouldnt make out, or that kissing your kids is wrong. However, there were also defenders who showed their support byposting similar pictures with their own children insolidarity with David and Victoria. Kissing a child on the lips can make them uncomfortable, especially as they grow older. Ultimately, its up to you to decide what works best for your family. "It's enough to confuse any young mind about the roles, feelings, emotions . My association with lip kissing is related to close intimacy between romantic partners. Of course, celebrities are used to everyone having an opinion about them and their lives, but why is this topic so polarizing? parenting expert and founder of Tools of Growth, Frankly, Its Nobodys Business When It Comes To How Many Children You Have. Charlotte Reznick is a licensed child educational psychologist, former UCLA associate clinical professor of psychology and author. At a conscious or . She's studied law at the National University of Cordoba, currently resides in Salt Lake City, Utah. Medical experts, and dentists, in particular, warn that there are many microbes in our mouths that may not be harmful to adults, but can be transmitted to little kids and harm them badly. While the photo racked up more than a quarter of a million likes, there were also dozens of comments saying a mother shouldn't be kissing her child on the lips. If you choose to kiss your child on the lips, its important to do so in a way that respects their physical boundaries and reinforces the message that they are in control of their own body. Kissing Your Child On The Lips Psychology | Lipstutorial.org However, under no circumstances, including, but not limited to, negligence, shall secretlifeofmom.com be liable for any special, incidental, or consequential damages that result from the use of, or the inability to use, the materials on this website. However, parents often miss the moment when itistime tostop expressing affection inthis way. Baby teeth arent asstrong asadult teeth which makes them more vulnerable tobacteria. Medical professionals, including dentists, are sounding the alarm about the potential dangers ofsharing saliva with children. Why cant you kiss them on the lips? Kissing a child on the lips is a traditional gesture of affection that has been used for centuries. These parenting habits have the potential tocontribute tothe development ofavictim syndrome inchildren, making itchallenging for them toestablish boundaries and assert themselves. Is it OK to kiss your kids on the lips? - Parents Canada Furthermore, she says that no documentations whatsoever has proved that kissing children on the mouth has caused any problems later on. It's worth pointing out that not all psychologists agree with Reznick, with Australian clinical psychologist Heather Irvine-Rundle describing her comments as 'an outrageous thing to say to parents'. But there has also been a backlash against it. A psychologist has spoken out to urge parents to go against the celebrity trend of kissing your children on the lips, warning it could have harmful effects on their development. So what does this mean for parents? Also explain the deep affinity that you are showing is just for them. Doctors say, children must feel loved and safe in the family environment. By Kris Di Remember when Victoria Beckham posted a photo of her kissing her baby daughter Harper on the lips for her birthday? For Dr. Fiona Martin on the other hand, she completely disagrees with Dr. Reznick; the doctor from Sydney Child Psychology Centre thinks that its absurd that a parents kiss would be considered sexual. At five or six, children become aware of their body and sexuality. By Mariel Reimann Top Parenting Article Shutterstock.com A few days ago Victoria Beckham published a picture of her kissing her daughter on the mouth with a loving message that said "Happy Birthday baby girl . When you kiss your little one on the lips you signal to them that their body border is open and that it is alright for someone to trespass on their territory. Despite its potential benefits, there are some risks associated with kissing your child on the lips. A Psychologist Explains Why It's Better to Stop Kissing Your Children Kissing achild onthe lips can make them uncomfortable, especially asthey grow older. Like her husband, the photo stirred up significant controversy. })(); Kissing Your Child On The Lips Psychology, Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window), Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window), How To Make Lips Smaller For Guys Naturally. Let us know your thoughts on the subject by joining the conversation in the comments and please share this article to spread awareness on this issue. "It's absurd really to think a parent kissing their child could be referred to as too sexual," Dr. Fiona Martin of the Sydney Child Psychology Centre told Daily Mail Australia. They can be blown in the air." Worse, a kiss can express almost anything from deference to adoration, friendliness to desire . Additionally, its important to be aware of the potential risks involved and talk to your child about them. Thus, invasive parents can increase the risk oftheir child developing avictim syndrome with the inability tosay no and manage their own personal boundaries. Email: mreimann@ksl.com. To make sure you never miss out on your favourite NEW stories, we're happy to send you some reminders, Click 'OK' then 'Allow' to enable notifications, .css-o3g03s{color:black;}Published18:28,02 May 2023 BST.css-1aaqh7x{color:#666666;}@media (min-width:1024px){.css-1aaqh7x{color:#666666;}}| Last updated18:28,02 May 2023 BST, Featured Image Credit: Instagram/@davidbeckham/@hilaryduff. They distinguished a kiss on the hand or cheek ( osculum) from a kiss on the lips ( basium) and a deep or. The lips and the mouth are the personal boundaries ofakids body, aspsychologist Charlotte Reznick explains. Here atBright Side wetried tofigure out, why this way ofexpressing love issohotly discussed and what opinion childrens psychologists have. Is it right or wrong to kiss your children on the mouth? Therapists If you have any insights, questions or comments regarding the topic, please share them in our Comment box below or check outtheAsianparent Communityfor more insightful parenting news and tips . Babies lungs are small, and any infection might cause breathing problems. Air Force 1 x Tiffany & Co. Air Force 1 1982 . We love each other, but do not say or show it with kisses and hugs. There's other ways to show love but not that one. Inrecent years, debates surrounding this topic have not subsided. 5 tips in parenting a stubborn child. Psychologist has urged parents to stop kissing their children on the lips So why is it that some people view kissing your kids as completely normal, while others find it repulsive? She has previously commented on the longstanding trend of celebrity parents posting photos of themselves kissing their children on the lips. This type of invasive parenting can increase a childs risk of developing a victim syndrome. This time it's Victoria Beckham . "It's normal. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); var _Hasync= _Hasync|| []; Back in 2010, Dr. Charlotte Reznick, a child psychologist from UCLA warned parents that kissing your kids on the lips could be confusing for them. . A passionate writer since her early school days, Oceana has graduated from writing nonsense stories to crafting engaging content forRead Morean online audience. She adds that a lot of families have different cultural habits when it comes to kissing. While other parents arent really thinking about the sexual aspect of kissing, there are certainly those in our readership who wouldnt consider kissing their children on the lips. The child may feel embarrassed, awkward, oreven unpleasant, but they may not beable toarticulate these feelings. However, not everyone takes this practice calmly. One dentist advised that parents should refrain from kissing children on the lips before their baby teeth have developed, as it could damage their pearly whites. Read Less, In a shocking revelation that has sent chills across Australia, especially, Are you a single mother? Terms of Service. we'll answer all your questions here in this video.The lips and the mouth are the personal boundaries of a kids body, as psychologist explains. Should You Kiss Your Kids on the Lips? - Yahoo Sign up for our newsletter, Happy Birthday baby girl ???????????? They see their father and mother kissing on the mouth, and then Mom and Dad come and do the same with them. You never know which actions can help your child and which might harm them. People who grew up with parents who showed outward displays of affection regularly will see it as normal. They are your kids. Dr. Reznick argues a kiss can stimulate and confuse them. The act of kissing is complex, multi-layered and deeply personal, with different meanings depending on the context. Stop Kissing Children on the Lips. From the traditionalists who believe it is a necessary part of parenting to those who think it is inappropriate, the issue is far from settled. The truth is, its up to you. Victoria Beckham's photo kissing her daughter on the lips sparked controversy worldwide. When you kiss achild onthe lips, you show them that their body border isopen and that someone can intrude into their territory with noproblem. The truth will come out this may have been acceptable in the 1990s, but times have changed, and we wont stand for it any longer. According to Roma Khetarpal, parenting expert and founder of Tools of Growth, it has to do with your personal experiences. Download theAsianparent Community on iOS or Android now! The lips are different because they have more nerve endings and are more sensitive to stimulation. And your newborn might beallergic tocertain foods orartificial ingredients inskincare products. Ifyou are concerned about boosting your childs self-esteem, take alook here. The psychologist points out that, even ifitwas aninnocent gesture onthe part ofthe parents, children learn things bymimicry. (function() { The child may start behaving the same way you taught them athome, but outside the family circle kissing other children oradults onthe lips asaway toexpress sympathy. They will outgrow it soon.. According to the good doctor, kissing on the lips is a slippery slope into God knows what other nightmares. Kissing someone onthe lips can transmit respiratory viruses. var hs = document.createElement('script'); hs.type = 'text/javascript'; hs.async = true; Because the enamel onbaby teeth isrelatively thin, itismore prone tocavities and decay. People dont like to hear this but the lips are an erogenous zone and feel-good chemicals that are associated with sexual arousal including serotonin and oxytocin are released through lip-kissing.. Is a kiss just a kiss? Keep Reading: Frankly, Its Nobodys Business When It Comes To How Many Children You Have. It just felt right. When Should You Stop Kissing Your Kids On The Lips You are communicating to your children that you love them, Dr. Martin explained to a local Australian paper. I loved nothing more than to plant a big ol sloppy kiss on just about anyone who would put up with me. And this also includes too much tickling, force-feeding, and tight swaddling. Cavities isthe most common chronic disease inchildren and adults, and kissing your kids onthe lips can increase their chances ofdeveloping this condition. Itmight benearly impossible toresist showering your kids with love, but kissing them onthe lips isnt the healthiest way toshow how much they mean toyou. It's extremely confusing," Reznick said as per a Family Share report. For example, a child may assume that the same behavior is acceptable from other adults, which could put them at risk for sexual abuse. How controversial is it to kiss your child on the lips? - BBC News One person wrote: "You should not kiss your son like that. Accept an online audience. I aim to teach my children the best that there is about love and respect within a family and if those gorgeous little beings want to kiss me on the lips, because thats part of how they show love, then its more than ok. Before I know it, theyre going to be 16, 6 feet tall and kissing me on top of my head and wont even remember the days when they pretended they were puppies dogs, licking my faceI have asked for less of this dog licking, but what are you gonna do? hs.src = ('//s10.histats.com/js15_as.js'); Dr. Martin works out of the Sydney Child Psychology Centre, and absolutely disagrees with Dr. Reznicks opinion on the inappropriate nature of kissing between parents and children. Is It Wrong To Kiss Your Children On The Lips? Thus, invasive parents can increase the risk of their child developing a victim syndrome with the inability to say no and manage their own personal boundaries.love, kiss, parents, child, child care, love for children, grandparents, uncle and aunty, informative world.#kiss #child #informativeworldThanks for watching. Irvine-Rundle adds that Reznicks reasoning that kissing them on the mouth will confuse children about who they are allowed to kiss is laughable. Other SAHM readers noted that they didnt kiss their children on the lips because of hygiene reasons, coldsores, and because of the culture they were raised in where that kind of affection just wasnt displayed. Every effort has been made to ensure that the information provided on this website and any material available from it is accurate. It is normal and healthy to be affectionate to your children. April 20, 2023 by Vanessa Kissing your kid on the lips: Cute or creepy? As a parent, your job is to respect that. If you start kissing your kids on the lips, when do you stop? she asked. I want My LO to feel my love and affection for her. It caused a heated discussion in the comments on whether it's acceptable or not. "It is normal and healthy to show affection for your children. Echoing Dr. Martins statement, Dr. Heather Irvine-Rundle says that Dr. Reznicks claim is laughable. This was not the first time people have criticised Beckham for kissing his kids. Well, this subject has for years stirred up a searing debate on parenting. Finally, its important to remember that a kiss on the cheek or forehead can be just as powerful in conveying your love and affection. Baby teeth have a different type of enamel and dentine to adult teeth, Dr Richard Marques, celebrity dentist at Wimpole Street Dental in London, explained to The Independent. Of course, there are a lot of parents, and experts, who think that kissing your children on the lips is totally ok. One of the supporters of this kind of behaviour is Sydney psychologist Dr. Fiona Martin. Children grow up and stop being babies. For a child, this kiss is extremely confusing. Tips and safety for newborn photography ideas at home, Is your child being "makulit"? We hope youve found this information helpful. Caregivers often assume that self-stimulatory behavior such as masturbation must have been taught, suggesting that the child was sexually abused. "While adults may be able to handle the microbes in their mouths, children with weaker immune systems are more vulnerable to harmful infections," he continued. Standing or sitting too close to someone Trying to see peers or adults naked Is a child's self-stimulation a sign sexual abuse? Laro ng lahi: How to play patintero, tumbang preso and more! Although not currently fulfilling the job of parent, her eight nieces and nephews keep her, and her reluctant partner, practiced and on their toes. As long as youre respecting both their boundaries and yours, and teaching them about other peoples boundaries, theres nothing wrong with it. A psychologist has spoken out to urge parents to go against the celebrity trend of kissing your children on the lips, warning it could have harmful effects on their development. So what is the answer, then? When my daughters were born I adopted the habit of kissing my daughters on the lips. Once again, the judgmental masses are all up in arms over a simple kiss between a parent and child. When you kiss a child on the lips, you show them that their body border is open and that someone can intrude into their territory with no problem.This also includes tight swaddling, force-feeding, and aggressive tickling. If you start to kiss your kids on the mouth when they are young, when do you stop? The Romans kissed their partners or lovers, family and friends, and rulers. When this happens, a child starts developing an inability to say no and keep their personal boundaries safe. On Instagram user commented on the photo saying: You people are sick for defending this. According to Reznick, even if the parents believe that this is just an innocent gesture of love, children learn and act by mimicry. Stay at Home Mum is the ultimate guide for real mums, the perfect, the imperfect, the facts and just a little cheeky! This is not the case. Parents share their views. In fact, she always kisses me on the lips too. The trend sparked an emotional debate about the implications this gesture could have - even with innocent intentions. "If you start to kiss your kids on the mouth when they are young, when do you stop? For instance, David Beckham faced criticism for such photos. This picture of Victoria Beckham kissing her daughter Harper on the lips has already been liked more than half a million times. Bytaking necessary precautions tolimit the exchange ofsaliva, parents can prioritize the protection and well-being oftheir children. Notify me of follow-up comments by email. It does not take into account relationships that are safe and trusting, she said. According to some experts, this intimate act of physical contact helps to foster a close bond between parent and child. The views and opinions expressed in the articles are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect those of the company and its management. Is it safe to kiss a baby on the lips? Although there may be families or cultures within which lip kissing between parents and children is considered acceptable, I believe that since most people feel more comfortable being kissed on the cheek by people, other than their romantic partners, that I prefer to model this to my children [4]. This also includes tight swaddling, force-feeding, and aggressive tickling. Theres nothing wrong with kissing your children on the lips. The truth is, even experts cant agree. Additionally, kissing can help boost a childs self-esteem and provide a sense of security in an uncertain world. But I never got kisses from any family members on the lips. I used to kiss grandma on the lips so I could try her lipstick on. As well as spreading colds and other infections via saliva transfer, it can also 'cause decay of baby teeth' and 'affect the soft tissues and gums before the baby teeth have developed', Dr Marques said. Kisses from mummy X," and it has thrown the world into a massive controversial conversation. We all love you so much ???????????? Psychologists explain that children often learn byimitating their environment. But almost instinctively, I stopped when both were about 18 months; stopping this practice felt as natural as it did to start it. Back in 2018, soccer star David Beckham came under fire after posting an Instagram photo in which he was giving his then seven-year-old daughter, Harper, a kiss on the lips. Dr. Fiona Martin from Sydney Child Psychology Centre disputes this theory. There are people who'd say that's acceptable and those who'd condemn you for doing so. In European cultures, kissing on the lips and cheeks is common, even between children and adults. Kids might develop gum diseases due topoor oral hygiene, and kissing your child onthe mouth might beanadditional risk factor. The child may start kissing other people on the lips as an expression of sympathy. This website uses cookies to improve your experience. Is it right or wrong to kiss your children on the mouth? Therapists This can beespecially harmful tonewborn babies. The facts show that some parents kiss their children on the lips throughout their whole lives. She thinks it is completely ridiculous that parents kissing their kids on the lips could be considered sexual. Its enough to confuse any young mind about the roles, feelings, emotions and feelings.. And since the child has aweaker immune system, Charlotte Reznick clarifies, some dangerous infections can enter their body through saliva. Advertisement David Beckham Backlash Oceana holds a Bachelor of Arts with a major in Writing and Indonesian, and has used her interest in languages to create a career online. A moment on the lips | Psychology | The Guardian Just personal opinion. January 11, 2017 11:43pm Shutterstock "Don't you just want to make out with your baby?" I was at a new-mom group with my then-6-week-old daughter, Lucy, when another mom sat down next to me. Do better, humanity. Next page, find out what other experts say about this controversial topic. Holy moly, Im pretty sure that never factored into my brain as a child or my parents brains. Reznick said they can actually become stimulated by a kiss on the lips . Inaddition toaffecting their understanding ofpersonal boundaries, itcan pose some health risks. Smart tips and fun ideas for girls of all ages, Expert advice for happier and healthier relationships, Discover the best products and deals for every occasion, Create a cozy and stylish home with our tips, See most curious photo projects and learn some hacks, All kinds of artists taking creativity to a new level, Funniest animal pics and some practical info, Discover fascinating facts and go fun yourself, Learn cool stuff about other countries and cultures, Solve top riddles and test your knowledge with fun trivia. X @davidbeckham @brooklynbeckham kisses from mummy X, Experts weigh in on the issue of parents kissing children on the mouth. Still never in my entire life did I see something wrong with those kisses, something inappropriate about them. As a child gets to four or five or six and their sexual awareness develops, the kiss on the lips can be stimulating to them.. Dr. Reznick argues a kiss can stimulate and confuse them. It comes down to what your family dynamic is just like any other cultural habit. [3]. To many, even thinking about this makes them sick to their stomach, while others consider this completely natural. (document.getElementsByTagName('head')[0] || document.getElementsByTagName('body')[0]).appendChild(hs); Its enough to confuse any young mind about the roles, feelings, emotions and feelings. Children grow up and stop being babies. Parents want tocuddle, hug, and kiss their children. Those who didnt will find it strange. It sparked a heated debate on whether this should be acceptable or not. Additionally, some psychologists believe that kissing a child on the lips can send mixed messages about appropriate physical boundaries.
Leading Sydney psychologists have labelled an American doctor's advice as 'outrageous' after she suggested parents shouldn't kiss their children on the lips because it is too sexual. Intimacy, in this case, refers to displays of affection such as holding, hugging, tickling or kissing a child.". At five or six, children become aware of their body and sexuality. The child may start behaving the same way you taught them at home, but outside the family circle kissing other children or adults on the lips as a way to express sympathy. This approach helps children develop anunderstanding ofpersonal boundaries and appropriate forms ofphysical affection indifferent social contexts. Why You Should Never Kiss Babies On The Lips - Ask Dr. Nandi With the cooler, Kids songs and TV shows can be so frustrating! Experts Explain The Effects Of Parents Kissing Children On The Mouth What's in a Kiss? | Psychology Today Dr. Martin works out of the Sydney Child Psychology Centre, and absolutely disagrees with Dr. Reznick's opinion on the 'inappropriate . Nor does secretlifeofmom.com warrant or make any representations regarding the use or the results of the use of the information provided on this website and any material available from it in terms of its correctness, accuracy, reliability, or otherwise.